Marc Sussman is a certified financial planner and a 29 year veteran of the financial services industry. With an insider’s understanding of the brokerage, insurance and mutual fund industry, he advocates for change; for a shift in orientation from sales to service; from revenue-driven tunnel vision, to a focus on client needs, as well as on the issues that are bigger than all of us. Marc hosts Money Message which airs every Saturday. Email Marc here feedback@marcsussman.com.

Forty in a
funk

Marc:

I’m
40 years old, and I recently moved back in with my parents, after ending
a long-term relationship. I’ve never been able to get my head above
water financially. I can’t seem to put any money away, I keep having
the same issues over and over again, and the only thing that raises
my spirits is shopping. I feel like my life is slipping away.

Maureen

 

Dear Maureen;

There are a few things that
you can do that will instantly raise your spirits. First, make a
gratitude list. There’s so much that you take for granted because
you live in a privileged society. You have running water, electricity,
indoor plumbing. It sounds trite, but you have your health, vision,
you can get up and walk, run. You have friends, you have the ability
to think, come up with ideas. You can write, sing. Be creative. If you
are, this list is endless.

You have parents that support
you. What an amazing gift. You can take you time and rebuild without
worrying about a place to be. Be grateful for that.

Then do two things:

1. Volunteer helping
   people less fortunate than you are. There are so many ways to do that.
   You can use your talents and be an online tutor. You can drive seniors
   to do chores, errands, food shopping. Deliver meals. There are so many
   organizations that need your help. The funk will lift, believe me.
2. Take your time finding
   work. Spend time doing things you love. If you love to shop, perhaps
   you could do that for a living. Offer to apprentice with a professional
   shopper. There are such things, you know. There is a world of difference
   between a job and a calling. Its out there.

Q: Fifty and
frazzled

Marc:

I’m stuck. I’m over
50, and separated. I have a grown son, and I’d like to provide
for him in the event that something happens to me. I don’t have much,
a retirement plan at work, and a home in my name, with a little equity.
Though we’ve been separated a long time, I have a good relationship
with my husband, and a separation agreement or divorce is not in the
picture.

My attorney has told me that
I cannot disinherit my husband, and I can’t change my retirement plan
beneficiary without my husband’s consent. What do I do?

Dear Stuck:

Your attorney’s right. Your
husband can “elect against the Will” and take a third of your estate’s
assets…. and your husband must sign off on any change of beneficiary
in your retirement plan, and you may be able to change the beneficiary
of your company life insurance.

You can buy some life insurance
and make your son the beneficiary. This personal situation is not likely
to change, and so term insurance may not be appropriate. Consult an
insurance professional, cost is always a consideration.

Finally, you’re in your 50’s
and have no assets besides a retirement account? Maybe there are
other issues to address.