News shows have flat-lined.
Wow! Yesterday I saw recently out-of-work Ashley Banfield on CNN with Jeff "Pops" Toobin. Jeez, guess who's looking for a job after TruTV or whatever was shuttered. Ol' "Sleepy" Toobin better watch out. His deliberate, slow delivery might be OK for a Cambridge 1L, but God, is he dull. Watch your back, JT. And speaking of boring, can someone please tell me what pictures Dr. Nancy Snyderman has of MSNBC officials with a barnyard animal to garner a spot in mornings? You've got to be kidding me. What's happening to television and entertainment and news? Where's Joan Embery? I hear she's available. No wonder Twitter's huge. Where's the "pop"?
And speaking of MSNBC, where's Joe as in "Morning Joe"? Have you ever heard of a show where the namesake is AWOL? Look, kids, this is the era of Beck, O'Reilly and that other guy. You've got to be and act alive. Sapience and reflection won't cut it. MSNBC's got Ed Schultz. He's loud, good and is the only guy in the lineup with a pulse. Watch CNN's Rick Sanchez also. Very good. A man with no self-respect. He was Tased on the tube. That's more like it. With the two morning cadavers, Geist and Barnicle, and the HD-phobic schoolmarm, how does MSNBC plan to compete? Oh, I forget. Jack Welch and Peggy Noonan. As to the former, keep the defibrillator handy.
Move over Morpehus, here's Wolf Blitzer. And finally, you know things are tough when you bring in Jack Cafferty (sans The Beaver Brown Band) for cleanup. And would someone check Anderson Cooper's jugular. You know things are bad when Candy Crowley is more exciting that Campbell Brown. Just go down the list, folks. Where's the farm team?