Mr. Medved's Science
Mr.
Medved's Science
Dear Doc,
I'm surprised you aren't familiar with the work Michael Medved's been doing in eugenics. Why just this week, he published a paper on America's genetic greatness in the prestigious Townhall on-line journal.
According to Medved, America is great because we carry the genes of ancestors who had the courage to risk everything in order to better their lives. That's why they came here.
He also points out that black people don't have these genes because their ancestors were slaves. According to Mr. Medved, that's why we have racial tensions; their genes can't compete.
Although he doesn't mention it, I suspect he may have developed his theory after studying his own family roots. The Medved line originates out of the Ukraine. "Medved" is a descriptive name that derives from a Ukrainian-Yiddish word that means, roughly, "that asswipe who rants from the closet." From what I gather, generation upon generation of Medved men lived up to that description. Indeed, they could do nothing else. It was their biological destiny.
It wasn't easy to be a village's medved. People quickly lose patience with "asswipes" who lob self-righteous rants at them from hidden positions. So for centuries, the Medved family was driven from shtetl to shtetl until finally, in 1907, the people of Melvin Medved's village drugged him and dumped him onto a boat bound for America.
And that brings me back to where I started. The best evidence for Michael Medved's theory is Mr. Medved, himself. The medved gene is strong in him. No doubt, thousands of Americans who have no inkling of his surname's etymology have found themselves muttering about "that asswipe who rants from the closet."
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The General publishes the blog, Jesus General, and operates the Cafe Wellstone in Second Life. He can be reached at gen.jc.christian@gmail.com and JC Christian on Skype.
Dear General Christian,
Have conservatives completely abandoned science? Why aren't there any great conservative evolutionary theorists or climate scientists.
Doc in Draper
Dear Doc,
I'm surprised you aren't familiar with the work Michael Medved's been doing in eugenics. Why just this week, he published a paper on America's genetic greatness in the prestigious Townhall on-line journal.
According to Medved, America is great because we carry the genes of ancestors who had the courage to risk everything in order to better their lives. That's why they came here.
He also points out that black people don't have these genes because their ancestors were slaves. According to Mr. Medved, that's why we have racial tensions; their genes can't compete.
Although he doesn't mention it, I suspect he may have developed his theory after studying his own family roots. The Medved line originates out of the Ukraine. "Medved" is a descriptive name that derives from a Ukrainian-Yiddish word that means, roughly, "that asswipe who rants from the closet." From what I gather, generation upon generation of Medved men lived up to that description. Indeed, they could do nothing else. It was their biological destiny.
It wasn't easy to be a village's medved. People quickly lose patience with "asswipes" who lob self-righteous rants at them from hidden positions. So for centuries, the Medved family was driven from shtetl to shtetl until finally, in 1907, the people of Melvin Medved's village drugged him and dumped him onto a boat bound for America.
And that brings me back to where I started. The best evidence for Michael Medved's theory is Mr. Medved, himself. The medved gene is strong in him. No doubt, thousands of Americans who have no inkling of his surname's etymology have found themselves muttering about "that asswipe who rants from the closet."
--
The General publishes the blog, Jesus General, and operates the Cafe Wellstone in Second Life. He can be reached at gen.jc.christian@gmail.com and JC Christian on Skype.
- FILED UNDER: Ask a Liberal, Right Wing Radio, Right Wingers
- May 16, 2008
Where do I begin with this...
"According to Medved, America is great because we carry the genes of ancestors who had
the courage to risk everything in order to better their lives. That's why they
came here.
He also points out that black people don't have these genes
because their ancestors were slaves. According to Mr. Medved, that's why we have
racial tensions; they're genes can't compete."
Maybe we have racial tensions because Medved gets paid for actually NOTHING (thoughtless opinions and banter) and black people, whose ancestors DIDN'T get paid for their many contributions (labor, inventions, childcare, etc.) that have made this country great, don't have the same opportunities or resources, and are held to a higher standard more so than any ethnicity in this country.
Competition not in their genes, they have succeeded, when Medved and his ilk, in lesser circumstances or at the first sign of a little bit of exertion, run to their families or use unethic or immoral, if not illegal, practices.
For all their talk, how about Medved and alike believing in their bluster about a level playing field and hard work, pay all those back wages with interest, and let the competition really begin.
Hey Medved where is all that "courage to risk everything."
- parent
By CeeCeefieldMay 16, 2008 - 6:33pm